She Returns...

...and it is bittersweet. I have trouble "facing" my blog, and that may sound strange but it is true. This micro-dot in the cybersphere is a sort of distant "home" to my heart, and we all know, it isn't always easy to come "home". Things are never the same are they?

Seems so very strange to me that my heart can feel so heavy yet be in complete acknowledgment that God is on the throne. The experience of His Grace and the experience of the trials necessary to understand that His Grace is all sufficient, render me speechless most times. Oh, I can muster little "blurbs" on FB but to actually come here...home, to hit the pressure release valve on my heart and pour it all out onto this glaring white screen like old times, is something I am finding more and more difficult to do. The trials and burdens I am used to sharing, no longer consist of the every day consequences of a large family with a focus challenged homeschooling mommy trying to make it through the day with a clean house to boast....no...our worlds now are forever changed aren't they? Each and every one of us now bear the worry of what tomorrow will hold in this very changed nation. Then, there are the hurts and burdens of friends, loved ones...dire circumstances and health situations that seem to be of such gravity that the English language limits us to even share with one another the depths of the sorrow we feel over these circumstances. Praise the Lord, He makes intercession for us...because, I'll be honest friends, I just don't have the words, only the tears to show for the white knuckled pleading in my heart. I'm so thankful that sometimes even to say the name of Jesus is enough to flood my heart with a sense of comfort....His name and all that it means to my heart helps to focus my mind. Just to lift my flesh bound hands and say His name brings such release when I remember all that He did on the cross. His very name holds more meaning than I could write in a life-time. My precious Lord Jesus, let me never fail to find comfort in letting my burden rest on your ever listening ear...