The Hunchback of Virginia Beach

I am cracking up at how my posts always seem to be drastically different from one to the next...such is my life.

Once a month, Brian has to work with his reservists and while I am so glad I get to see him in the evenings, Sunday mornings, I miss his helping hand in getting the children ready for church. This past Sunday was especially challenging because Anjolie, who is picky anyway, was having a fit because I didn't have an extra t-shirt for her to put on under her dress...and the life threateningly tight sash was not quite tight enough...as, according to her, she could still *breath*. Quite frankly, I did not have time, nor was I in the mood, to find a solution or prepare another outfit for her to wear, and I made that fact as clear as I possibly could.

After dealing with her huffing and puffing pouting, Anjolie finished getting ready and we were all ready to walk out the door. Before we walked out, I noticed about an inch of one of Anjolie's pink pj shirts was poking out of the top of her dress...another 5 minutes of crying and pouting and correcting pass...I sent Anjolie up to her room to get the pj-shirt off and quickly loaded the other 3 in the van. Anjolie, in much better spirits, finally joins us in the car -albeit with a heavy winter coat on that I told her she would not wear into church since it was too warm for that.

The Yost family minus Daddy made it to church with 5 minutes to get 3 in Sunday School, one in nursery and myself to class...I was breathless but thankful the morning seemed to be smoothing out. My mind was full with what the day held and it was all I could do to concentrate on Pastor's class, but about midway through, I was focused on what counted- a day of worship.

You know, these crazy things that happen in this household are too crazy to be made up...this stuff is better than fiction, I tell ya. I prefaced the incident with all this to hopefully win you to the *how* I could have "missed" the "hunchback" thing. So hang on...to make this hopelessly endless....

After Sunday School, it got a little crazy again as I have to pick up the girls from class in the next building and quickly move Ayden to another nursery room sign him in, grab a pager and finally get into the sanctuary for the service. Since Brian wasn't there, I couldn't get up to choir, which turned out to be, a.good.thing. When I picked up Anjolie, I noticed that my friend wasn't there teaching, only her husband, and since he was busy, I called Anjolie to hurry and go with me to church. Anjolie turned around to say goodbye to a friend and as she turned, I saw the straaangest thing. Lo and behold, there was a leg of tights hanging down her back from her collar...............what.in.the.WORLD? Yes, a leg of white tights just uh, hangin' from the collar of her navy blue dress, like it was cool...the rest of the thing remained stuffed down her dress. At least, the foot appeared fresh and clean, I noticed-so, it coulda been worse, like the foot coulda been filthy black or something. Anyhoo, I pulled out the tights as we quickly walked to church, me shaking my head and Anjolie whining somethin' about her zipper bein' cold.... I thought, perhaps, I hadn't used enough fabric softener or something! I NEVER would have guessed they were there on purpose! Oh, honey, it aint OVER YET!

We were walking briskly, the 3 of us, and I shoved the tights quickly into my purse before we entered the main building. As we herded ourselves into a pew, I noticed Anjolie still had a huge hump on her back! I kid you not...and the row behind me was witness, to the near entire panty/sock/tights drawer that I fished out of the back of Anjolie's dress before their eyes. YES! Who knows what was going through the poor people's minds as they tried to cover their chuckles. I did what any stunned mom would do... gave a helpless hand lifted shrug and an apology....I mean, what does one SAY about something as unexplainable as this? Anjolie thought it seemed pretty logical that, since she didn't have a t-shirt to shield her back from the cold zipper...shoving the entire panty drawer down her back would have to suffice. So, have you about "heard it all" now? Somehow I'm thinkin' I shoulda just let the pink pj shirt slide...just this once.