Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Hunchback of Virginia Beach

I am cracking up at how my posts always seem to be drastically different from one to the next...such is my life.

Once a month, Brian has to work with his reservists and while I am so glad I get to see him in the evenings, Sunday mornings, I miss his helping hand in getting the children ready for church. This past Sunday was especially challenging because Anjolie, who is picky anyway, was having a fit because I didn't have an extra t-shirt for her to put on under her dress...and the life threateningly tight sash was not quite tight enough...as, according to her, she could still *breath*. Quite frankly, I did not have time, nor was I in the mood, to find a solution or prepare another outfit for her to wear, and I made that fact as clear as I possibly could.

After dealing with her huffing and puffing pouting, Anjolie finished getting ready and we were all ready to walk out the door. Before we walked out, I noticed about an inch of one of Anjolie's pink pj shirts was poking out of the top of her dress...another 5 minutes of crying and pouting and correcting pass...I sent Anjolie up to her room to get the pj-shirt off and quickly loaded the other 3 in the van. Anjolie, in much better spirits, finally joins us in the car -albeit with a heavy winter coat on that I told her she would not wear into church since it was too warm for that.

The Yost family minus Daddy made it to church with 5 minutes to get 3 in Sunday School, one in nursery and myself to class...I was breathless but thankful the morning seemed to be smoothing out. My mind was full with what the day held and it was all I could do to concentrate on Pastor's class, but about midway through, I was focused on what counted- a day of worship.

You know, these crazy things that happen in this household are too crazy to be made up...this stuff is better than fiction, I tell ya. I prefaced the incident with all this to hopefully win you to the *how* I could have "missed" the "hunchback" thing. So hang on...to make this hopelessly endless....

After Sunday School, it got a little crazy again as I have to pick up the girls from class in the next building and quickly move Ayden to another nursery room sign him in, grab a pager and finally get into the sanctuary for the service. Since Brian wasn't there, I couldn't get up to choir, which turned out to be, a.good.thing. When I picked up Anjolie, I noticed that my friend wasn't there teaching, only her husband, and since he was busy, I called Anjolie to hurry and go with me to church. Anjolie turned around to say goodbye to a friend and as she turned, I saw the straaangest thing. Lo and behold, there was a leg of tights hanging down her back from her collar...............what.in.the.WORLD? Yes, a leg of white tights just uh, hangin' from the collar of her navy blue dress, like it was cool...the rest of the thing remained stuffed down her dress. At least, the foot appeared fresh and clean, I noticed-so, it coulda been worse, like the foot coulda been filthy black or something. Anyhoo, I pulled out the tights as we quickly walked to church, me shaking my head and Anjolie whining somethin' about her zipper bein' cold.... I thought, perhaps, I hadn't used enough fabric softener or something! I NEVER would have guessed they were there on purpose! Oh, honey, it aint OVER YET!

We were walking briskly, the 3 of us, and I shoved the tights quickly into my purse before we entered the main building. As we herded ourselves into a pew, I noticed Anjolie still had a huge hump on her back! I kid you not...and the row behind me was witness, to the near entire panty/sock/tights drawer that I fished out of the back of Anjolie's dress before their eyes. YES! Who knows what was going through the poor people's minds as they tried to cover their chuckles. I did what any stunned mom would do... gave a helpless hand lifted shrug and an apology....I mean, what does one SAY about something as unexplainable as this? Anjolie thought it seemed pretty logical that, since she didn't have a t-shirt to shield her back from the cold zipper...shoving the entire panty drawer down her back would have to suffice. So, have you about "heard it all" now? Somehow I'm thinkin' I shoulda just let the pink pj shirt slide...just this once.

21 comments:

Leah said...

ROFLOL!!!! I can just imagine. I bet she thought she was so smart. I know this is totally inappropriate but my son was about 8 and had started playing baseball and had to buy "protection" he was so excited to have it that he worn it to church and was sooooo uncomfortable, we still tease him sometimes.

Heather said...

Hahahahha!! That's not inappropriate...that is life! Thank you for making me feel like some of this stuff is at least a little normal!

mholgate said...

That is the funniest story! Thanks for sharing!

I can relate to getting kids ready to go to church by yourself. Since my husband is a Pastor, not only does he go to church way before us, I often end up sitting by myself because he has so much to do during the service.

Blessings,
Melissa

Robin said...

What a hoot!! Thanks for the chuckle. She's quite creative, you have to give her that.

Danielle said...

wow how great!!!!! I can't wait to be married and have fun advetures with kids like that!!!LOVE,Laurie

Ashleigh (Heart and Home) said...

Wowsers, girl... the things that happen in your house make my life seem TAME. :) I know, I know--just WAIT!!

Cheryl said...

That was too cute! Your kids are so funny! You need to write a book about your kids "adventures", that would be a best seller!
Cheryl

Pam--in Estonia said...

Why did this story not surprise me? I can totally see Anjolie doing that! I can imagine the people around you trying to hold back the laughter... too funny :)

Becky said...

I absolutely love your real-life stories! (Matt especially enjoys the "potty" stories....and we gave a Baby Alive to our niece last year. That first diaper change was priceless.) Ahhh, it's so good to have you back! Yes, I agree you should write a book!

liz said...

Your kids are so full of life and personality! I love the stories.

Tori said...

Ok now that was way too funny, What a hoot she must be.
I'm so glad something like this happened to you and not me, the Croatians really wouldn't have understood. HA!

Thanks for the laugh this morning I needed it!

A Note From Theresa said...

lol I understand your embarrassment but it's still funny.

Jade said...

Wow, Lol! You always have the best stories to tell! You should write a book.

btw, you've been given the "Uber Amazing Blog Award" and the "Triple Award"! You can get them over at my blog=)

Rhonda said...

That is hilarious! You just can't make up stories like that. I haven't been able to make up any stories that were funnier than real life happenings with my kids! Thanks for the laugh!

Mrs. Julie Fink said...

I love this! I have a daughter who was just like this!

CONNIE'S THOUGHTS FROM THE HEART said...

Dear Heather, I read this post a few days ago and laughed and laughed. I was not able to comment at that time. But I have not forgotten. Your post made my day!!!! Thanks so much. I hope you have had a wonderful day today and that this next week will be one filled with happiness for you and your family. connie

Cherlyn said...

Oh, to have the logic of a kid, again!

:)

I would take this over chicken pox, any day... *whine*

HOPE said...

LOVE IT! You took your readers right there! I was laughing so much it hurt! You are truly gifted in writing and YEPPERS...write a book about the kids!

Hugs Heather..
HOPE

Kristi said...

*LOUD AND BOISTEROUS SNICKERS*

HA HAAAAAAAAA

ROFL

I am laughing, girl! The panties were clean too, right? LOL

~Kristi

Tiffany said...

I love your posts so much!! I think you should write a childrens book!!! I have to admit I was a lot like your daughter when I was little!! I grew out of it once I got into jr. high. :)

Sis. Tammy said...

This is the first time I've been to your blog. I just popped over from Sis. Julie's. I have to admit, that was priceless!! LOL LOL LOL

We were on furlough once (we're missionaries in England)and our daughter, who happened to be 2 at the time; had on this little dress made like overalls (really cute it was) with tights and a shirt. I got caught up in the singing while she walked up and down the little pew. The next thing I know when I looked back behind me there she stood in only her shirt and tights. Talk about a shocker. Bad enough, but the song leader and the Pastors wives were a few rows behind us (noone in between) cracking up! Needless to say I turned very red and laughted alot, too!! Hey, it happens to the best of us!!!!!!!!!!!!